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October 15, 2008
This video shows surveillance footage of the Attack Dog's(Allies) primary and secondary combat functions.
Battlefield reconnaissance has revealed at least these facts about the attack dog:
• Enhanced Bark -- as demonstrated by the infamous "Dog Vs. Bear" and "Dog vs. Soviet Infantry Division" photo series' of last year, the attack dog is a formidable opponent in one-on-one combat, but far less so when pitted against multiple armed attackers. Recognizing this, the Allies have outfitted each eager pup with a Sonic Disruptor device, allowing for a high-decibel bark capable of temporarily stunning an enemy and enabling a quick exit on the dog's part..
• Heightened Senses -- CCR training has enhanced the already naturally powerful sensory abilities of the German Shepherd, allowing attack dogs to detect the nervous flop sweat of an enemy infiltrator at great distance. Rumors that the Soviets have attempted to counter this with mandatory usage of government issued "Trotsky" brand cologne have so far proven unfounded.
• Doggy Paddlers -- Muscular and long of limb, German Shepherds are natural swimmers, an ability encouraged by their Allied trainers. It is not an uncommon sight to see a Allied Aircraft Carrier enter the battlefield accompanied by a coterie of canine companions.
• Not Anti-Tank Weapons -- Despite the best efforts of their CCR trainers, attack dogs remain less than effective against vehicles.